Anxiety has become one of the defining experiences of our culture. News headlines, social media, and even our entertainment are permeated with unease, reflecting the tension many of us carry quietly in our own bodies. In our practice as therapists, we often meet people who say, “I know I shouldn’t feel this anxious, but I can’t turn it off.” However, from a relational perspective, anxiety isn’t just something to fix. It’s a signal worth listening to.
The Many Faces of Anxiety
Anxiety doesn’t always look like nervousness or constant worry. Sometimes it appears as irritability, obsessive thoughts, physical ailments, people-pleasing, sleepless nights, or an inability to slow down. Beneath these patterns lies a nervous system on alert, scanning for cues of safety or threat. In that sense, anxiety is a deeply intelligent process that evolved to keep us safe. The problem arises when our bodies never receive the message that it’s safe to rest.
Why Anxiety Feels So Widespread Right Now
The world around us is amplifying those internal alarms. We live in a time of rapid change, marked by political polarization, economic uncertainty, climate instability, and an unrelenting flow of distressing news. Many of us maintain a constant, low-level vigilance—an awareness that something could go wrong at any moment. Add to that the isolating effects of digital life and post-pandemic social shifts, and it’s no wonder anxiety has become the default experience for many of us.
From a relational standpoint, collective anxiety makes sense. When human beings feel disconnected or uncertain about their place in the world, their attachment systems activate. We look for reassurance: Am I safe? Am I seen? Am I alone in this? When we can’t find reliable, consistent support, our nervous systems remain on alert, even in moments of quiet.
Our Fascination with Anxiety on Screen
It’s likely no coincidence that film and television are filled with anxious storylines; psychological thrillers, dystopian futures, and shows centered on social collapse or inner turmoil. In some ways, our culture is watching itself process anxiety.
Storytelling gives us a symbolic way to face fear safely. We can project our worries onto fictional characters and experience emotional release when they find resolution, or even when they don’t. In moments of uncertainty, these stories allow us to externalize what feels too large to hold alone. They make our collective nervous system visible.
Paradoxically, by watching characters navigate anxiety, we find a strange sense of comfort. It reminds us that fear and uncertainty are universal, not personal failings.
What Anxiety Is Trying to Tell Us
In Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT), we understand anxiety as a protective signal, a response to perceived disconnection or danger. Often, beneath the racing thoughts and physical tension lies a deeper emotional message: I’m scared of losing something that matters. I need closeness, reassurance, and stability.
When anxiety spikes, it can be tempting to fight it or try to think our way out of it. But true healing begins when we slow down and ask, “What is this anxiety protecting me from?” Perhaps it’s a way to guard against disappointment, loneliness, or rejection. Once we identify our deeper fears, we can begin to address and soothe them. We do this not by reasoning with anxiety, but by responding to the unmet need beneath it.
Therapy becomes a space to practice this. The therapeutic relationship helps us feel safe enough to turn toward our fear rather than away from it, allowing us to experience co-regulation with another person who remains calm, curious, and present. Over time, the body learns that anxiety is not an emergency, it’s a call for connection.
Meeting Anxiety with Compassion
Therapy can help us shift from treating anxiety as an enemy and start viewing it as an ally that’s simply been working too hard. The goal isn’t to eradicate anxiety but to recalibrate it, to help the nervous system remember the difference between real danger and emotional vulnerability.
When we approach anxiety with compassion, we create space for the body to settle. Breathing, grounding, mindful awareness, and gentle relational contact all signal, “It’s safe enough to pause.” Over time, this softens the constricting cycle of fear and resistance, freeing up resources for more flexible, creative, and pleasant experiences.
Moving Toward Calm Together
Culturally, we are being asked to develop new ways of finding calm amid chaos. That may mean setting boundaries around media exposure, cultivating deeper in-person relationships, or simply rediscovering stillness. When we regulate together, through conversation, eye contact, shared laughter, or even silence, we remind one another that the safety of connection is possible, even in an unpredictable world.
At TBCRP, our work is grounded in the belief that healing happens in connection. Anxiety, viewed through this lens, isn’t just a sign of distress. It’s an invitation to reach out, to be known, and to rediscover a felt sense of safety within ourselves and with others. When we listen to ourselves and each other with compassion, we begin to transform fear into understanding and isolation into connection. Read more about our approach to Anxiety here.
